My mother-in-law promised to answer my question once she got out of the hospital, but she never did. 

She died the following week.

Surveying how people felt about the future, I was counting on her for something provocative; something genuine; something meaningful. She did not disappoint me. Without ever saying a word, she demonstrated the epitome of hope.

Looking back on a life well-lived and looking forward to eternity with her Lord, both past and future seemed good to her. She was content with the life she was leaving and secure in the life that awaited her. With calm confidence Scottie asked for a peaceful passage from this life to the next. With her family at her side she said her goodbyes, fell asleep, and never woke up. She was not afraid.

How could she do that? How can someone face death and not be overwhelmed with fear?

I had begun researching the topic of "fear vs. hope" months before her stroke, asking over 100 people how they felt about the future. Many said they were hopeful, yet honestly explained their fears due to illnesses, unemployment, and a variety of family and personal crises. Most confessed that they vacillated back and forth between fear and hope. As one person put it, “Hope usually has a way of winning out over fear.” 

I wondered. Could it be that one actually needs fear in order to fully experience hope? 

I think so.

As I see it, most of us balance fear and hope to one degree or another. Depending on which one is winning out, we often settle into one of four states: depression, despair, delusion, or faith. It should be noted here, however that there is no reason we have to stay put in any one state, particularly the “D” states. 

Depression`- Unfortunately, there are some people who have little of either. They cannot even look to the future. They have neither fear nor hope. They have nothing. They are too overwhelmed with today to even consider tomorrow. These people live predominately in a state of depression.

Despair - Others live in fear and have little or no hope at all. For them, life is a series of unforeseen crises. Chaos prevails and, for these tormented souls there is little chance of things ever getting better. Their future is uncontrollable and overwhelming. Feeling hopeless, these people live in a state of despair.

Delusion – Still others exude hope but never seem to experience any fear. They defy reality and ignore some of the cautions that keep most of us safe. They feel invincible and often make a series of poor choices, always believing that somehow they will be rescued and live happily ever after. Living in a fantasy, these people exist primarily in a state of delusion.

Faith – For many others, they live life in the balance. They experience fear in a healthy way that creates caution and fosters courage. They also experience hope in a healthy way that creates optimism and confidence. When they face the unknown of the future they are fully aware of the likely obstacles and trials that will affront them. They know there will be illness, pain, disappointments, and yes even death. But they also know that God will be with them during those times just as he has in the past.

These past several months I have been listening to people tell me their stories as they explain their outlook for the future. It’s their past. 

Let me explain.

I think we believe God will show up in our future, because we know where he has shown up in our past. We recognize his handiwork. We have seen what he has done in our lives and we are confident that he will continue his faithfulness in our future. This does not mean we are immune from fear. Hope simply overpowers it.

The key to a hope-filled future is to understand your promise-filled past. Some questions to ponder:

Looking back over your life, when has God surprised you by bringing the right person along at just the right time?

When has God surprised you by rescuing you from a dead-end job that you never would have left without being fired?

When has God surprised you by healing you spiritually instead of physically?

When has God surprised you by creating beautiful relationships out of disastrous conflict? 

When has God surprised you by giving you a second chance that you know you didn't deserve? 

When has God surprised you by bringing restoration out of brokenness? 

A few days ago, I stumbled across the words of a friend I’ve known since junior high school. Responding to my survey question about the future, he (now suffering from a terminal disease) wrote: “As a born-again believer, of course I am hopeful....”

Of course? How could he be so hopeful? Why isn’t he in despair? 

I think I know.

My friend understands the hope of Psalm 23. Even though he walks through the valley, under Death’s Shadow, he will not live only in fear because God is with him and comforts him. Sure he’s scared from time to time. But his faith causes hope to overpower fear. He knows who holds his future even if he’s not sure what the future holds. 

My mother-in law will enjoy meeting him.